Episode 23 - Halloween III: Season of the Witch - Genius or Bollocks?

WARNING: This episode contains significant spoilers for the film Halloween III.

In this episode, Val looks back on the troubled history of the film Halloween III: Season of the Witch.

It was a sequel that John Carpenter and Debra Hill didn't want to make. But they found inspiration in one of Carpenter's horror heroes - British science-fiction writer, Nigel Kneale.

In an audacious move, they decided to make a film unlike any other in the Halloween franchise. "Not a knife movie, but a pod movie," said Debra Hill.

Could they pull it off? As the production broke down in acrimony between Kneale and Carpenter, critics called it a disaster. Fans were divided. And the film has remained controversial ever since.

It's time to make the call... Halloween III - genius or BOLLOCKS?

Transcript

This episode of the Retro Podcast Massacre will contain significant spoilers of the film “Halloween III: Season of the Witch”. I won’t tell you what happens in the end, and I’ll avoid major shocks, but I will be revealing the sinister plot of the film’s villain and describing the film’s most shocking scene. 

Listen on, at your peril. 

Do you hear that?

That is the sound of two innovators of horror, crashing into each other. 

In October of 1983, a film would be released, combining the horror genius of visionary writer and director John Carpenter with the macabre talent of prescient writer Nigel Kneale. The influence of both men on the modern horror genre is immense.

Their combined talents would come together in a film, widely regarded by critics at the time, to be a massive pile of pish. 

However, over the intervening years, the film has come to be reassessed by horror fans. Many of whom now consider it to be a colossal pile of pish. 

But that would be to discount the views of this films’ many devotees. And in fact many horror fans now consider “Halloween III: Season of the Witch” not only to be a classic of 1980’s horror cinema. But a full-blown classic full stop. 

It is somewhat amazing that, even after all these years, the debate still rages. Which is why this episode of the Retro Podcast Massacre is entitled. “Halloween III: Season of the Witch – Genius or Bollocks?”

[THEME]

[CLIP FROM ‘HALLOWEEN II’]

As a person of Irish descent, it has always bothered me that Donald Pleasance mis-pronounced the name of the ancient Celtic festival in “Halloween II”. For as all Celtic folk know, although the word is spelled “Sam Hain” it is pronounced “Saoirse Ronan”. 

Ha ha ha. I’m just having a little gentle Celtic fun with you there. The word, scrawled by Michael Myers on a blackboard in Haddonfield in the film “Halloween II” is pronounced Sow-an. And it would be the only connecting tissue between this film and an in-name-only sequel, “Halloween III: Season of the Witch”.

It was not intentional. 

John Carpenter describes the experience of writing Halloween II, the sequel to his unexpected monster-hit and game-changing horror movie as an unhappy one. He’d done what he’d wanted to do with Michael Myers. He had scared the living shit out of us. He’d made suburbia unsafe. He’d made us check our cupboards, look in the backs seats of our cars and think twice about having sex with Bob.

He didn’t want to revisit those same ideas in Halloween II. And it shows in a film, which is definitely exciting and suspenseful, but never more than a gorier, less interesting re-tread of the original with Jamie Lee Curtis in a bad wig. 

And – SPOILER ALERT – at the end Michael Myers is DONE. Finished. The last time we see him, he is blind and on fire. There’s no coming back from that. John Carpenter had put his creation down for good and there was ABSOLUTELY NO WAY he would be able to return for eight sequels and a remake. That’s just crazy talk.

But there was no doubt that there would be another Halloween movie. The pressure was too great. 

Dino de Laurentiis, the famed Italian producer had got involved with Halloween II, and pushed hard for another movie. De Laurentiis gets bad press, as a producer interested only in money and not in quality. Well, and then also because of the time he told Meryl Streep she was too ugly to syar in King Kong. And the time he offered the chance to direct King Kong to Frederico Fellini.

But, King Kong stories aside, you should remember that without de Laurentiis we’d have no Blue Velvet, no Manhunter and no Evil Dead II. But he was not known for subtlety. It was his influence that resulted in reshoots on Halloween II, to make it gorier than its predecessor. And when it came to Halloween III… well, I’ll just leave that thought there for a while. 

Carpenter was so NOT interested in a third movie; but de Laurentiis and his cash proved persuasive and so the project moved ahead. Carpenter determined that the second sequel would be a Halloween film in concept only. That all further Halloween films would be stand-alone tales, only linked by the theme of Halloween. It was his producer Debra Hill who came up with a concept for this third movie – witchcraft in the computer age. 

Director Joe Dante liked this idea. Joe Dante is a successful director, probably most famous for his mischievous black comedy, “Gremlins” along with “Innerspace”, “The Burbs” and “Matinee”. He also sports an impressive shock of hair which looks like it was painted on by an enthusiastic toddler, but we shan’t hold that against him.

At this stage in his career, Dante had already made the quite wonderful monster film “Pirahna” and the fabulous werewolf movie “The Howling” when John Carpenter approached him to direct Halloween III. Now Dante was also good friends with John Landis – the man behind “Animal House” and “The Blues Brothers”. And despite the fact that John Landis’s werewolf movie, “An American Werewolf in London” had been in direct competition with “The Howling”, the two men often met to discuss upcoming projects.

And it was in this way that Joe Dante learned writer Nigel Kneale was in Hollywood, looking for something to do. John Landis had wanted to remake the 1950’s creature-feature classic, “The Creature from the Black Lagoon” and brought Kneale to California to work on the story. The biggest problem being that Kneale was an irascible genius. Convinced he knew how to make horror and dismissive of anything that did not fit his definition. He had never seen “The Creature from the Black Lagoon” and was unimpressed with it when Landis screened it for him. He instead fashioned an entirely new story. Of a lagoon FILLED with fabulous monsters. 

I mean. It sounds great. But also EXPENSIVE. So the project died. Landis and Dante joined up with Steven Spielberg and George Miller and went off to make “Twilight Zone: The Movie” together. 

And so I hope my convoluted preamble is starting to make sense now. We have de Laurentiis, waving his cheque book around for Halloween III, Debra Hill wanting to go in a different direction, John Carpenter more interested in his own projects than in being heavily involved; and Nigel Kneale, bopping around in Hollywood with nothing much to do.

Joe Dante mentioned Kneale’s presence to Carpenter – knowing he would be interested because they were both huge fans of the writer. Carpenter met with Kneale and the two discussed Debra Hill’s concept. Kneale was intrigued. The Season of the Witch was underway.

Nigel Kneale had made his name terrifying British television audiences in the 1950’s. An actor and playwrite, he’d been recruited to join the BBC television’s drama department 1952 and found it in a pretty poor state. Back then, the BBC was not very ambitious – and their idea of filmed drama was to stick a camera in front of a theatrical play and let it follow the actors about.

Kneale determined to write something more dynamic and contemporary – and science fiction seemed to offer the answer. He wrote a six-part serial entitled “The Quatermass Experiment” which absolutely terrified my parents generation. It’s a massively influential piece of science fiction horror, about three European astronauts who are sent into space. But when they return to earth, two have completely vanished – and the third… is not quite the same somehow…

The idea of a parasitic alien species is clearly an inspiration for Ridley Scott’s “Alien” some 25 years later. In a chilling plot strand from the tv show, there are terrifying hints at what happened to the other two astronauts as well. The surviving astronaut – an Englishman – can suddenly speak German. Hinting that the German astronaut hasn’t so much been killed… as absorbed…

The tv show was an absolute sensation to 1950’s British tv audiences, who tuned in every week, terrified and fascinated by the six episode serial. It was so successful that a small British film studio, which had mainly confined itself to silly comedies decided to buy the rights for the movies adaptation. The name of that studio was Hammer… and their film of The Quatermass Xperiment was so successful that they’d stick with horror movies for the next twenty years. 

Meanwhile, the film was released as “The Creeping Unknown” in the USA. A young man from Kentucky named John Carpenter saw the film and it blew his mind. 

Kneale would continue with sci-fi horror for his next project – a controversial adaptation of George Orwell’s 1984, featuring a quite brilliant performance from Peter Cushing as Winston Smith. It was raw, and uncompromising. And as far from the cosy world of 1950’s British tv as it was possible to be. Question were asked in the Palace of Westminster about the suitability of such scenes for British television audiences. 
 
 

But the controversy would not slow Kneale’s progress. TV and film versions of his next Quatermass adventure – entitled Quatermass II followed soon afterward. That series saw aliens using remote Scottish oil refineries as a cover for terraforming the earth in preparation for an invasion. 

But it was his next Quatermass project that introduced one of the most intriguing themes of Kneale’s writing to the fore. In this film Professor Quatermass once again finds himself up against alien intelligence. But this time, it’s when an ancient alien craft, buried beneath London is unearthed. In a mind-blowing twist, he discovers that aliens had tried to colonise Earth millennia earlier – but by proxy! Transplanting their intelligence into our minds! 

[CLIP]

In this way, Kneales writes a science-fiction tale that also manages to loop in superstition and folklore – as the aliens resemble cloven-hoofed, horned devils. And explains why our deepest fears take the form of Lucifer. It was a fantastic piece of writing, drawing from racial tensions being felt in London at the time of writing. And unlike so many second sequels it was actually a massive improvement - building on the character of Quatermass and making his world even more dangerous. Again, Hammer would adapt this into a film and honestly, if you’ve never seen it, you must seek it out. It’s a landmark piece of British science fiction horror, influential, intelligent and thrilling.

This idea – of tying ancient folklore to modern science – would crop up again and again in Kneale’s work. In his serial, “The Road”, villagers in an 18th century village are terrorised by ghosts – which turn out to the victims of a 20th century nuclear attack. In his disturbing tv play, “The Year of the Sex Olympics” tv audiences are kept dull, moronic and muted with a reality tv show that features sex, murder and rape. 

And I should emphasise. This was in 1968. Fifty years before, “Ex On The Beach USA”.

In his 1970’s tv play, “The Stone Tape” scientists attempt to find a new recording and playback medium in a haunted house, but succeed only in amplifying the pitiful screams of ghosts and driving themselves toward insanity. And in his final Quatermass serial, Britain has turned into a dystopian madhouse. With young people flocking to sites like Stonehenge, drawn there by a strange signal, only to be harvested by a voracious alien species for their protein.

The common recurrence of supernatural and science in Kneale’s work is informed by Nigel Kneale’s upbringing on the Isle of Man – an island between England and Ireland which retains more knowledge of Celtic mythology than the mainland. This mixture thrilled Carpenter, but due to the tight schedule, he was able to give Kneale only six weeks to form his ideas into a coherent script. Kneale explained that this would be fine, but that this would be a very different picture to Halloween 1 & 2 – which he didn’t care for at all. It would be a subtle, psychological horror. A slow ramping-up of suggested horror, with none of the unnecessary gore from Halloween II. 

Of course, Carpenter was still without a director at this stage. He filled that post with long-time collaborator Tommy Lee Wallace – yes! The Shape himself! Tommy Lee was one of the actors who played the part of Michael Myers in the original Halloween, and had also made contributions in art direction and sound design in Carpenter’s early films. In fact, he was originally offered the chance to direct Halloween II, but turned it down as he felt he would be boxed in – forced in directing a Halloween sequel, to copy his mate’s style.

Of course, with Halloween III, the deal was quite different. This was going to be a whole different film, an entirely different story and Wallace would be free to make it his own. Which is kind of ironic, because it still really looks like a John Carpenter movie. Maybe the guys just had a similar sensibility. Or maybe it was because John Carpenter’s favourite cinematographer Dean Cundy also came on board. It’s possibly one of those things you only notice when you watch Halloween 1 and 3 back to back – but these films are GORGEOUS to look at. Especially in the dark. No-one can highlight how dark the dark is, than Dean Cundy armed with an arc-light and a camera. 

So it’s all coming together right? We’ve got a director! We’ve got a cinematographer! John Carpenter and musical collaborator Alan Howard agreed to step up and provide a typically eerie Carpenter sountrack! And Nigel Kneale is putting the finishing touches to his script! What could possibly go wrong?

Oh. Wait. Do you remember, Dino de Laurentiis? The guy who insisted on reshoots on Halloween II because it wasn’t gory enough? 

Yeah… about that…

De Laurentiis did not like Kneale’s script. It wasn’t gory enough. It needed more heads being pulled off, he suggested. Maybe a drill in the ear?

Kneale explained that his film was slow ramping up of suggested horror, remember? Completely different from Halloween II, remember that?

Long story short, Kneale flounced. He went back to England, where he ended up adapting Susan Hill’s terrifying play, “The Woman in Black” for British tv. It’s a wonderful tv film – a slow ramping up of suggested horror…. Oh, you get the idea. But definitely worth a look if you get the chance.

This left Carpenter with a problem. He had a script – which was not gory enough – and no writer. The poor man sighed, bought himself a six-pack of beer and went over to Tommy Lee Wallace’s house to finish it off to de Laurentiis’s satisfaction. So what audiences eventually got, in the Halloween of 1982 was a film that was two parts Kneale, and the rest a collaboration between Carpenter and Wallace. But because Carpenter didn’t want to be credited, and Kneale insisted his name was removed from the credits, the whole thing goes to Tommy Lee Wallace – who seems a bit embarrassed to be taking all the credit for other people’s work. 

But quite who is responsible for what in the story is one of those fun games horror movie fans can play. So let’s play the game with a quick recap of the story!

The film opens with a man desperately running from a sinister men in suits. He manages to kill one of them, and eludes the others, escaping to a nearby garage where he collapses saying simply, “They’re coming…” The man ends up in hospital, still clutching a Halloween mask and is placed under the care of Dr. Daniel Challis – played by horror favourite Tom Atkins. 

Tom Atkins is obviously a bit of a horror hero, due to his appearances in classics like Maniac Cop, The Fog, Creepshow and Night of the Creeps. And he’s one of those immediately lovable actors who clearly puts much of himself into every role. Seeing him interviewed, he comes across very much like the characters he plays. He’s a relaxed, charming rascal of a man. Self-effacing and honest. He started out in his career, working with Frank Sinatra on The Detective and James Garner in “The Rockford Files”. 

I don’t know how much those two actors influenced him – but he certainly shares their easy charm and laid-back cool. 

In Halloween III, I strongly suspect that Dan Challis is supposed to be more of a burnt-out, bitter alcoholic than he is, with a distant relationship with his wife and kids. But when he put Tom Atkins in a role like that, he’s a lot less tragic and a lot more Dean Martin.

[Lounge music]

I wonder how much of this script was re-written to accommodate his charming personality? It is sort of hard to say, although I’m sure writers must take into account when Tom Atkins is playing a character. In “The Fog” he leaps into bed with Jamie Lee Curtis without even knowing her name. And there is apparently even an action figure of his character Detective Ray Cameron from “Night of the Creeps” which comes with a bottle of beer as an accessory.

Certainly in “Halloween III” Dr. Dan spends most of his hospital scenes flirting with nurses. And even Tom Atkins will admit that he’s still not entirely sure what sort of doctor Dan actually is.

But while he’s off winking at nurses, another sinister man in an immaculate suit enters the hospital room of the comatose patient and murders him with absolute brutality – plunging his fingers into the helpless man’s eyes. The mysterious man then calmly walks to the parking lot and sets himself on fire. It’s a terrific, scary escalation of the story so far.

Dr. Dan drowns his sorrows at a nearby bar where he meets the daughter of the murdered man, Ellie – played by Stacey Nelkin. She’s an actress who would go on to star mainly in tv after Halloween III – but her other big claim to fame is that she says she was the inspiration for Woody Allen’s film “Manhattan” – having had an affair with the dirty old bastard while he was making Annie Hall.

I think what I’m trying to say here is this. The next time you have an urge to watch a Woody Allen movie; watch “Night of the Creeps” instead. You’ll have a better time and you’ll feel better about yourself having done it with Tom. 

Ellie and Dan discuss her father and their only clue as to his murder – the Halloween mask he was gripping when he was admitted to hospital. It’s immediately familiar to Dan as it was manufactured by a company called “Silver Shamrock” who are THE Halloween mask manufacturers. His kids have Silver Shamrock masks and Silver Shamrock masks are in every store. The masks are promoted by a jingle that plays endlessly on the television.

If you’ve seen the film you will know what I am talking about. If you have not then let me say this. The “Silver Shamrock” jingle will get into your head and subconscious. You will find it running through your head at the store. You will find yourself humming it when under stress. You might even burst into song when your wife is going into labour or when you’re undergoing eyeball surgery. 

It's that sort of fiendish earworm. It’s catchier than the best of ABBA and worse than the worst of Nickelback. 

In fact. I’ll bet you’re singing it to yourself right now, aren’t you? Just because I mentioned it. You ARE? Aren’t you?

STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT!!!

BE ASHAMED TOMMY LEE WALLACE AND JOHN CARPENTER. BE VERY, VERY ASHAMED.

But back to the film. The insidious jingle has ensure all the local kids have Silver Shamrock masks and are primed for the big giveaway to be aired on a special slot at 9pm on Halloween. Quite what all of this has to do with Ellie’s father is a mystery.

But apparently Dan is having a slow day at the hospital, because the pair of them decide to visit the factory where the mask was manufactured, to see if they can discover any clues as to his murder. This also means Dan has to ditch his wife and kids – but – well – you know, “Tom Atkins”. 

Ellie and Dan’s road-trip takes them to the weird little town of Santa Mira. It’s a town built around the toy factory, run by genial Irishman, Conal Cochran, played by Dan O’Herlihy. Cochran is a dapper, elderly gentleman with a shock of white hair and a smile as wide as a hunting knife. He’s like a sinister version of Val Doonican. 

But Cochran’s overly-friendly manner isn’t the only unnerving thing about Santa Mira. The whole place seems under strict control. And as Dan and Ellie drive into town, the locals peer at the interlopers with suspicion. CCTV cameras follow their every move. And whose voice is that, announcing the town curfew?

[CLIP]

Could it be our old friend, Laurie Strode? Well, you have to admit, Santa Mira California is a great place to hide from Michael Myers. 

Ellie and Dan are spooked enough by the place to investigate further, but first, they need to discuss sleeping arrangements.

[CLIP]

[PORN MUSIC]

Oh, Tom Atkins. It is a good thing you are so lovable or I’d find this behaviour just downright reprehensible. 

Another visitor to Santa Mira is Marge – played by Garn Stephens, who was Tom Atkins real-life wife at the time. She’s a toy retailer who makes the mistake of poking about with the Silver Shamrock label badge. This is a bad move. When she sticks a pin into the badge something shoots out of it and blows Marge’s face clear off. It’s a wonderfully gory, nasty little effect. And a nice set up for what’s to come…

Ellie and Dan are disturbed when Marge is rushed off to hospital, with bland assurances from Cochran that she will receive the best of care. But things take a turn for the worse the next day when Ellie disappears, while searching for her father’s car. It’s left to Dr. Dan to uncover the truth and save the day. But the men in suits are tracking him, and it’s at this point that Dan discovers the hideous TRUTH about them! They are actually unkillable lifelike ROBOTS, filled with mechanical parts and supernatural goop. Dan is soon captured and finds himself at the mercy of Cochran who lays out the whole hideous plan. A fantastically twisted practical joke on the children of America. 

For you see, Cochran and his evil minions have stolen one of the stones from Stonehenge! They are grinding it down and using it to create silicon chips which will be triggered by the Silver Shamrock giveaway at 9pm! At that point, the eldritch POWER of the stone will unleash the power of witchcraft upon the children. And they will be slaughtered in their thousands to appease the ancient gods!

As if that weren’t bad enough, Cochran gives Dan a chilling “demonstration” of the masks. In one of the most shocking scenes in an 80’s horror movie – in fact in horror movies full stop – Cochran chuckles as he places a regular family in front of the tv set, while their son dons his Halloween mask for the big giveaway. The insanely cheerful music plays incessantly. The child CLAWS a the mask, desperately to take it off. His parents don’t seem to notice what is happening as the mask dissolves and the cheery pumpkin smile disappears. The child collapses in agony as deadly snakes, spiders and cockroaches erupt from the mask. 

It’s still an horrifically effective scene. Like nothing else in 80’s horror. And the genius of it is that you can’t SEE what is happening. You can only imagine what has happened to the head of that child. Your mind’s eye is left to visualise his eaten face, his protruding jaw, eyeballs pushed out of place by spiders and snakes… We are left with only the screams of his parents, and that music, like hysterical laughter in the background…

Like all classic Bond villains, with a super-secret lair and a mindless army at his control, Cochran doesn’t kill Dan. He wants him to WITNESS his ultimate TRIUMPH. He places Dan in a storeroom in front of a tv set, and with a cursed mask over his head… awaiting his CRUEL fate…

I’m going to stop right there. Because that’s 90% of the plot and if you haven’t seen it, I hope it will encourage you to seek the film out so that you can liberate Dr. Dan from that room yourselves and find out if he manages to get back with Ellie. Errr… I mean, “his wife and children.” Or maybe with Jamie Lee in “The Fog”. I’m sorry, but with Tom Atkins, it’s really kind of hard to say.

From interviews with Tommy Lee Wallace, he says that the script is still about 2/3rd Nigel Kneale – however, he claims that Kneale’s take on it was much darker, and more cruel. Almost like an American version of “The Wicker Man” with Dr. Dan ending up being readied for sacrifice. In addition – and to meet the demands of Dino de Laurentiis, Carpenter and Wallace appear to have introduced Cochran’s automated assassins, as a means of introducing more gore to the movie. Nigel Kneale has spoken dismissively about the scenes of heads being yanked off, and off drills being applied to ears.

But I can’t help but feel that’s a little unfair to Tommy Lee Wallace – and in fact both of those scenes are staged (relatively) tastefully. A lot is hinted at, but not very much is shown due to lighting or blocking. In the UK, the film was released under a 15 certificate, so certainly the British censors didn’t think this film was too gory. 

As for the rest of the tale – it does feel like a Nigel Kneale story. That strange mix of supernatural and science to create something wholly unique is why I think this film gets the appreciation that it does. There are very few other stories – either made in the 80’s or outside of it – which are as audacious in mixing the two genres. 

Strangely enough though, it was not Kneale who brought in the Stonehenge connection. I don’t know whether it was Carpenter or Wallace, but given that Carpenter was a huge Kneale fan – and given that Kneale’s final Quatermass story strongly featured Stonehenge, I wonder if it was Carpenter’s little homage to Kneale. Carpenter would, of course, go on to write the movie “Prince of Darkness” – a Nigel Kneale-esque tale about the devil getting into a computer – and credit it to his pseudonym “Martin Quatermass”. The production notes for “Prince of Darkness” stated that Martin was a brother to the rocket scientist “Bernard Quatermass”.

Nigel Kneale did not take this genuine tribute particularly well. He hurriedly issued a statement to the Observer newspaper stating that he had NOTHING to do with “Prince of Darkness” and hadn’t even seen it. “It sounds pretty bad,” he added, before going on to say, “With homage like this, one might say, who needs insults? I can only assume it is a whimsical riposte for my having my name removed from a film I wrote a few years ago and which Mr. Carpenter, carpentered into sawdust.”

Incidentally, younger people, this is what a 1980’s Twitter war looked like. 

Carpenter was much more gracious in response, stating that the use of the Quatermass name was merely his way of showing how much he admired Kneale’s writing. “His work means a host of a million things to me,” he went on. As for Kneale’s response, John Carpenter simply said, “Nigel was very embittered by the way of the world, as was shown, I think, in The Quatermass Conclusion”.

It’s a shame. I can see both sides. John Carpenter just wanted to make a good movie and get it finished. But it seems like Nigel Kneale never forgave Carpenter for accepting the reality of the situation and making compromises to get the film over the line. 

Despite this behind-the-scenes wrangling over the story, it sounds like Halloween III was a fun shoot, and everyone involved seemed to have had a great time. Tom Atkins has nothing but warm words for Tommy Lee Wallace and the feeling when the film was finished was that they’d made an unusual, but thrilling horror movie. But Debra Hill was keen to emphasise that it was not a continuation of the Michael Myers story. That was a “knife movie” she said, this was a “pod movie”. And Wallace ensured we got that connection to that most classic of pod movies, “The Invasion of the Body Snatchers”. 

There are a couple of really clear references – firstly the ending, we sees Dr. Dan screaming a warning into the camera, just like Kevin McCarthy at the end of Don Siegel’s 1956 classic. And also the renaming of the town where Silver Shamrock is based from Kneale’s “Sun Hills” to “Santa Mira” – the original setting of Body Snatchers. 

Hill and Wallace were quite right – despite the killings of Cochran’s robots, this is far more of a paranoid conspiracy horror movie than a tale of a lurking stalker. They emphasised and re-emphasised this. And reiterated it should NOT be marketed as a continuation of the Michael Myers tale. 

Oh hey, guess what Universal did when they distributed the movie? 

Yes, that’s right. Not only was the tag-line very VERY reminiscent of John Carpenter’s original – “The night he came home” becomes “The night NO-ONE comes home” for Halloween III. But the posters and the advertising blurred the fact that this was a new, original and very different story. To the point where famed American film critic Roger Ebert got completely confused and assumed that Michael Myers WAS the one doing all the killings at the start of the movie. He then got very confused with the Cochran plot kicked in. 

Needless to say, Ebert gave the film a terrible review. And in fact, he and his on-screen film critic partner Gene Siskel got their mascot, “Aroma, The Educated Skunk” to include it in his “Stinkers of the Year” selection for 1982. 

Siskel and Ebert were not alone. The film got negative reviews all over the place – mostly for NOT being a Halloween sequel. Fans were angry that Michael and Laurie didn’t feature in this film. But other criticisms were that the film was slow, the plot was hackneyed and silly, and that the May to December romance between Tom Atkins and Stacey Nelkin was sexist. 

To take those one at a time, I don’t think you can accuse Halloween III of being slow. It launches into the action right from the start, and the investigations of Ellie and Dan take barely any time at all before they’re in Santa Mira and heads are being yanked. 

Wait. Let me rephrase that. “Heads are being pulled off.” No, that still sounds bad. Moving on. 

As for the plot – I must admit that it does feel like an outdated tale – even for the 1980’s. It feels much more like a story someone might have told in the 50’s and 60’s. You’ve got a dastardly, Blofeld-style villain with a secret base and an army of minions, up against a square-jawed hero who can usually fight his way out of a scrape, with a manly sock to the chin. For one reason or another, horror movie audiences had moved on by the 1980’s. They just didn’t TRUST that old style of hero anymore – and would much prefer to see a strong female hero up against the villains. Tellingly, it was Debra Hill who admitted that she too, found the screenplay a little old-fashioned.

Nothing against Tom Atkins, but Dr. Challis does feel like a bit of a throwback. Compare this movie to Michael Crichton’s 1978 thriller, “Coma” which feels more dramatic and suspenseful for having Genevieve Bujold do all of her own investigations, rather than team up with a hunky hero to go around biffing people. 

The evil plot – I would agree – does risk becoming just silly. But Tommy Lee Wallace has an ace up his sleeve with Dan O’Herlihy. Even as he’s laying out the film’s just RISIBLE plot, it is delivered with such conviction you can’t help but get caught up in it. O’Herlihy also said he had a fine time working with Wallace, and thoroughly enjoyed making the film… although he didn’t think much of the finished product. 

As for me, I must confess I find the film slightly frustrating. I do have a lot of affection for the movie, and I hope that comes across. Not only do I really enjoy the actors, and the look of the film, but this was the first ever horror movie I saw at the cinema. As I mentioned, it was a certificate 15 in the UK – and I felt very grown up, going to see a proper scary movie at the pictures at the age of 14. I was such a rebel. 

But if I’m truly objective, I must admit the biggest problem with the film is that it just ISN’T that scary. Cochran’s robots are nowhere near as chilling a presence as Michael Myers. And maybe it’s because they are portrayed as TOO human, too realistic. Again, I can’t help but compare Halloween III to a Michael Crichton movie. The androids in his film “Westworld” are much scarier – because they’re not quite right, they’re not perfect. They’re blank and malfunctioning and it makes them more chilling. 

In Nigel Kneale’s script, there are no robots of course. Just Cochran – who was to be revealed as a 3000 year old demon. In Kneale’s script, Ellie’s father is killed when Cochran visits him in his hospital room and summons up ghosts and demons. It’s hard to say how that might have played out – given the state of special effects in 1982 – but in my head at least, that sounds a lot more frightening. 

So, in my judgement, Halloween III will always be labelled as a flawed, yet heroic attempt to try and do something really different with a Halloween movie. I can’t bring myself to say it’s a bad film. It’s fun! It’s thrilling! It has some extremely effective scenes, some marvellously effective make-up effects, a brilliant villain in Dan O’Herlihy and a charming lead in the ever-watchable Tom Atkins. As a film, I really enjoy it – Dean Cundy’s camerawork is wonderful and there are so many beautiful scenes of Halloween – my favourite being the children parading along in their outfits as the sun goes down. And for this reason I can see why many horror fans watch it every year to put them in the mood for the festival of Saoirse Ronan. 

But is it as scary as it wants to be? Is it as scary as John Carpenter’s classic?

Of course not. And just like Dr. Samuel Loomis, this film failed to kill off Michael Myers. He would return in 1988 in Halloween IV, leaving Halloween III out on its own as a bizarre horror curio. The Halloween movie that wasn’t.

But I hope in this episode I’ve managed to mollify the haters and satisfy the lovers. I hope I’ve brought you together, in appreciation of the most unusual, intelligent and downright wacky entry in any of the big horror franchises. A film deserving appreciation for what it does well and forgiveness for what it fumbled. 

Because bringing people together and satisfying the lovers is what Tom Atkins is all about, baby. And don’t you forget it…

[PORN MUSIC]

This episode of The Retro Podcast Massacre was record in Paraparaumu, New Zealand. Your host tonight was Val Thomas.

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Thank you again for choosing to spend your time with us and Tom Atkins. And pleasant dreams…